Dearest V,

Did you know that my birthday is officially in spring? All this time I thought I was a child of summer.

Isn’t it funny how you can be wrong about the simplest thing your whole life, and then you wake up one day and everything you thought you knew turns out to be wrong, and the whole world looks different all of a sudden?

All my love,
C

Dear Viv,

Went for a long walk along the canal today, all the way to Oberbaumbrücke. Caught the pink-and-purple sun setting against the Spree.

There are cranes everywhere — more evidence of a city in transformation. Berlin seems to be in a constant state of impermanence, just like the rest of us.

Hugs and kisses,
C

My dear V,

Had coffee and sandwiches with L yesterday, and realized I haven’t been to F-Hain in so long! Remember when I used to live near Frankfurter Allee, with that girl and her dog?

I forgot how massive it is — and loud. All that traffic whizzing by. A majestic procession of yellow-and-cream, tiered like royal wedding cakes, I wrote in my journal.

Miss you,
C

Dearest V,

Spring is officially in the air. The sun is out. Birds are chirping. And, people are drinking beers in the park without a coat on.

Plus, it smells heavenly, like flowers in bloom. Maybe, this will be the year I finally learn how to identify plants.

Hope you’re not still buried underneath a foot of snow!

Much love,
C

Dear Viv,

Met K at a gallery in Mitte today. The sun was shining and everything had a sort of rosy pink shade to it.

We fell in love with the same sculpture, a giant bowl of blue. There are so many different shades — ultramarine, cobalt, indigo, electric blue, cerulean. Woad, even.

I wanted to dive straight into it and come out flying the other side!

Missing you so,
C

My dearest V,

The strangest man came into the cafe today. He told me all about his Thai wife, and the FBI agent who beat up his daughter, and how Iceland has the best drinking water in the whole world.

Sometimes, I think I’d make a whole lot more money as a therapist. But then, I suppose, I’d have to actually care what people say.

Sending lots of hugs your way,
C

Dearest V,

Just read a lovely memoir by a New York magazine writer.

At first, you think it’s all about love and motherhood and being a woman and a writer and adventure and travel and curiosity and hope and facing your fears. But in the end, it’s really about grief and alcoholism and surrender.

Her newborn dies on a trip to Mongolia. Don’t you think that’s the most God awful thing that could ever happen to a person? It makes me sad every time I think about it.

Hugs,
C

Dear V,

I got a lovely, new sweater in the mail today, and I think you’d love it — it’s black and brown and blue! I wore it every day for a week. I’ll try to include a picture the next time I get a chance.

I’m sure you’re looking stunning as always.

Much love,
C

Dearest V,

I’ve been wet-eyed about everything today. The simplest sentence makes me cry.

I never used to be this emotional. Do you think it means I’m finally becoming more of a woman?

Come to think of it, I’m probably just getting my period – I have been eating an awful lot of chocolate today.

Love,
C

Dear V,

I’ve been having all kinds of trouble sleeping lately. Woke up early, fell back asleep, then woke up again all hazy in the afternoon. Does this mean I’m getting old?

Now, the sun’s almost set and the whole day seems gone. And, I’ve still got to go fetch some fruits and vegetables. Oh, how I hate shopping for food.

Kisses,
C

Dear Viv,

Met up with A and some of the comedians last night. We wanted to go dancing, but I got to the bar too late, and A wasn’t feeling it. So, we drank beer and had falafel with peanut sauce instead.

Then, I rode the U-Bahn home alone at 3am. The nights have been freezing cold.

Hope you’re staying bundled up in this weather.

Love,
C

My darling V,

The girls just told me they’re coming to visit. Can you believe it?

They’ll be my first visitors from home in three years. Other than you, of course.

I’m so excited, I can hardly stand it. July is still a long way’s off, but now I have something to look forward to!

Miss you,
C

Dearest V,

I’m realizing more and more that writing really is a very lonely profession. There’s no one to rely on but yourself.

Maybe I’ll find a collaborator one day. You know, like, someone to exchange ideas and cocktails with.

But, don’t worry, I still love writing to you most of all.

Forever yours,
C